The blog of the Body Oak Cliff community

This blog seeks to capture the latest reflections of the Body Oak Cliff team (Joel & Deborah), as well as stories of transformation in our community. Many of the posts include reflection questions to help you interact with the content. If you find something that resonates with you, consider sharing it with a friend or small group and let the questions prompt meaningful conversation.

We hope that what you read here will encourage you on your journey and empower you to love in the everyday!

You are a human, not a machine. (Or, “Treat your body as you would your child.”) (Guiding Principles of Slowing, #3)

By Deborah Pulis | Dec 6, 2019

When I first started working for Body Oak Cliff, I was a merciless taskmaster. I would sit at my desk in our windowless, fluorescently-lit office and command myself to complete my to do list. It might be 2 or 3 o’clock in the afternoon, and I hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast (if I’d remembered to…

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Wake up to the World Around You (Guiding Principles of Slowing, #2)

By Deborah Pulis | Nov 26, 2019

There is a lot of talk these days about being “woke” or “enlightened” or “evolved,” as if those are states of being that some elite few exist in, while the rest of us carry on as primitive creatures. And while I may be tempted to fall into this line of thinking from time to time,…

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Do One Thing at a Time (Guiding Principles for Slowing, #1)

By Deborah Pulis | Nov 15, 2019

The title of this post represents the first Guiding Principle that I want to offer as a path out of Consumerism and into a life where Presence and Creativity are possible. (I am calling this second pathway, “Slowing.”)  Do one thing at a time. We start here because it is a simple maxim with life-altering…

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Slowing: An Antidote to Consumerism

By Deborah Pulis | Oct 28, 2019

In each and every moment, love is available to us in such quantities that, even if spread across the span of a natural human life, we could not fully enjoy or appreciate it. Every moment is bursting with life – life abundant, the kind of life that both awakens and nearly (but not quite) satisfies…

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There’s No Such Thing as Perfect Parenting (A Final Reflection)

By Deborah Pulis | Oct 11, 2019

When I’m a parent, I’m going to do better. That’s what I told myself when I went through Faithwalking in 2013 and learned that we all have childhood wounds, many of which are caused by our parents. Armed with the knowledge and experience of those retreats, I felt powerful and sure-footed. I knew all the…

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The Gift of Intergenerational Dialogue (Part 6)

By Deborah Pulis | Sep 13, 2019

Think about the divisions facing our country right now. We can’t agree on the best way to approach education, healthcare, crime, and so many other important topics. We can (mostly) agree that our current system is broken, but there’s no consensus on the best path to improvement. I don’t want to suggest that there is…

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From Grief to Gratitude (Part 5)

By Deborah Pulis | Sep 3, 2019

What if it isn’t possible to be at peace with yourself unless you are at peace with your parents? What if the next step toward healing from childhood wounds is a step toward the people who wounded you? [This is Part 5 of a series on the Parent/Child Relationship.Find previous posts here: Part 1, Part…

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Confronting Our Wounds (Part 4)

By Deborah Pulis | Aug 26, 2019

In my previous post, I suggested that the number one reason we don’t feel ready to take responsibility for our part in our relationship with our parents is that we feel wounded. We may not think of ourselves as wounded. We may feel like we’re doing just fine. But if you feel a vague sense…

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Can One Person Always Change the System? (Part 3)

By Deborah Pulis | Aug 19, 2019

The idea that “one person can change the system” sounds nice in theory, but when we think about applying it to our real-life relationships, it may start to feel elusive. What if I feel like I have no power in the relationship? What if there’s no relationship left between us? My parents hurt me badly –…

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